Well, I'm a cis/gay man, but we share a lot in common, Kitty. Most everything you've written about giving oral sex could apply to me. Somewhere banging around Medium is an old story I wrote about discovering oral sex, about how (when I first attempted the act) it flipped some sort of primordial switch inside me. THIS, I told myself, THIS is the most intimate, sensual, satisfying, desirable physical act I could ever imagine.

I was only about 18 years old, but I haven't changed my mind since. I certainly have a more varied sexual repertoire now, but to be honest, that's mostly because I want to be able to satisfy partners. I've been a top. I've been a bottom. I've been a side.

But very little has changed inside me since I was a teenager. Giving oral sex remains the pinnacle of satisfying intimacy for me.

Of course I don't know if that will remain true for you, but I wish you a great deal of satisfaction and pleasure on your way to discovery.