This is what so confusing about prosperity-gospel folks like Osteen.

I mean Jesus was this radical itinerant preacher in Galilee who commanded people to love one another and give their possessions away to the poor. Like all their possessions. He constantly berated rich people. He hung out with poor people and didn’t try to make them rich. He liked that they were poor, that was kind of the point, I think.

He told parables in which rich people were the villains and poor people were the heroes.

So now Osteen comes along and besides all his nasty homophobic racist shit, says Jesus wants you to be rich and if you follow him correctly (like how I tell you to, and including by sending me lots of money), he will make you rich.

That’s the weirdest twisting of the story of Jesus and the gospels that anyone could possibly imagine. It’s so weird it’s laughable. But, that doesn’t stop him. Certainly not when he’s got his own private jet to fly around in, paid for by his listeners, of course.