James Finn
1 min readAug 13, 2024

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This is such a bizarre idea. In my experience, gay men like me can be as insecure, jealous, fearful, etc over personal relationships as anyone. We worry that our guy will leave us for greener pastures — for another man.
That's just part of being human, unfortunately.

I'm as gay on the Kinsey scale as possible, in that not only have I never experienced sexual attraction toward a woman, I feel repulsion when thinking about women as sexual.

Yet, I have felt jealous at times when I thought a boyfriend might be more interested in another guy than me.

So, I just don't get how anything is different when bisexual men are in the mix. I mean, would I feel more jealous if I thought a boyfriend was more interested in a woman than me?

I don't think so! I think I would be equally jealous in both cases.

And I think a solid, healthy relationship would preclude that kind of jealousy, anyway.

We're all insecure. We all want to be loved. So why let biphobia throw up needless obstacles to relationships and happiness?

That's how I see it, anyway.

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James Finn
James Finn

Written by James Finn

James Finn is an LGBTQ columnist, a former Air Force intelligence analyst, an alumnus of Act Up NY, and an agented but unpublished novelist.

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