The problem is not, Steve Hays, that you “hit a nerve.” That’s condescending of you to suggest. As a straight man, and one who enjoys the privilege of the assumption of sexual morality, condescending is not something you need to be doing with members of gender and sexual minorities.

If your intention is actually to tell Luke that his being gay is not a problem and that Christians who tell him that is are wrong, then you have failed to do so in the article I read.

Instead, you implied very strongly that he has something to struggle with. Again, that’s a toxic message, and not something at all appropriate for you to be communicating to queer youth.

If you intend to “systematically dismantle” arguments, then I would suggest you take a deeper look into the biases and toxic assumptions that are leaking out of your letter, particularly your conclusion, which turns it into a poison pill and makes it utterly inappropriate and unhelpful for queer youth, who bathe daily in rivers of homophobic bigotry.


cc: Jon Carl Lewis, John A. Giurin, Ken Wilson, Emily Swan

Writer. Runner. Marine. Airman. Former LGBTQ and HIV activist. Former ActUpNY and Queer Nation. Polyglot. Middle-aged, uppity faggot.

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