Thank you very much for this.

As a gay man raised in an evangelical Christian world, one of the most profoundly insulting phrases I experience when it’s directed at me is, “Hate the sin but love the sinner.”

I shake with rage and sorrow when I hear it, as a matter of fact.




“Are you effing serious?” is what I think to myself.

If a person wants to be absolutely certain to shut down any possibility of communication with me, they can do do two things to ensure their goal.

  1. Call me a sinner.
  2. Tell me they hate my “sinful” sexuality.

I am not now and I will never be amenable to interacting or even being friendly with people who presume to brand me a sinner because they think they know what their God thinks about my sexuality.

And if they then go so far as to actually hate what is a core, essential element of my basic humanity?


That’s just so horrible and evil of them.

I’m constantly surprised when Christians object to my reaction to this insulting and dehumanizing catch phrase.

Thank you for pointing out some of the problems with it.


Writer. Runner. Marine. Airman. Former LGBTQ and HIV activist. Former ActUpNY and Queer Nation. Polyglot. Middle-aged, uppity faggot.

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