So, I guess a lot of people know that in the gay male world we have problems with status symbols and unrealistic beauty standards. We just published an article about that in P&P — written by a guy who wants to work on systemic problems that make some of our communities quite unhappy places for some men.

In fact, that's a conversation that happens relatively often among gay men. We know we have some cultural problems and we want to work on them, even if realistic solutions are less than obvious.

So, I find myself asking why we don't have a problem analogous to incels in the straight world. I mean, all the same conditions are there. The hypercompetitive quest to date the most handsome, most successful man, the worship of youthful good looks, treating guys like objects instead of people. All of that exists to one degree or another in parts of our communities. (Just take a gander at gay Instagram.)

It's unhealthy, and we know it, but if we have incel types running around, they aren't a movement.

Is it just a numbers game? Would we be more likely to have something like incels if our populations were larger? Or is something else going on?

Which just leads me to ask, why IS the incel movement a movement? Self-described incels sound very dysfunctional, so what gives them cohesiveness and identity as a group?

And more importantly, what can be done about it?