"more and more people with anal incontinence"

This bit of urban myth has permeated the culture for decades, often used as a form of gay bashing.

But if anal incontinence among people who enjoy receptive anal sex were really a significant problem, documenting it would not be difficult. Plenty of gay men fit that definition and are happily enjoying anal sex right up into their sixties and seventies and beyond.

I'm not saying anal incontinence never happens, but I am saying that it's so rare you almost never hear about it – among people you'd expect to hear from the most.

According to studies I've read, older gay men are not more significantly likely to need adult diapers than anybody else. My personal experiences bear that out. I'm 60 this year, and I know tons of older gay men. I've never met ANY gay man with anal incontinence problems.

Just saying.