I’ve written about this before, but I had a huge wake-up moment one Halloween. My partner Lenny and our friend Carla dressed me up as Mae West, and we went out on the town for the night.

As a man, I’m used to body autonomy. I’m not used to people touching me unless they are intimate friends. I’m not used to having my hair stroked, my cheeks caressed, or my bottom pinched.

I don’t think any man is used to that.

Yet all those things and more happened to me over and over again that night when I was dressed as a woman.

Admittedly, some of it was probably playful nonsense from friends who were teasing me, but most of it wasn’t. Most of it came from absolute strangers.

I think a lot of men would do well trying to step out in women’s shoes for a night.

But maybe not the heels I stepped out in. My feet hurt like hell the next day!

Writer. Runner. Marine. Airman. Former LGBTQ and HIV activist. Former ActUpNY and Queer Nation. Polyglot. Middle-aged, uppity faggot. jamesfinnwrites@gmail.com

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