I’m trying to imagine how I would feel if I were on the beach and a stranger made a comment about my swimsuit, possibly suggesting that I change from trunks to Speedos.

I can imagine very few circumstances in which that would feel appropriate to me. Now, if another gay man had been obviously cruising me, and I had been openly receptive, maybe I’d be cool with that comment, taking it as a continuation of flirting we’d already begun.

But the reason I wouldn’t be cool with it from a stranger is because it would feel like flirting, flirting I hadn’t invited or agreed to. It might feel like sexual intrusion or harassment.

Commenting on intimate attire like that is boundary crossing. It’s not cool. And I’m pretty sure men understand that it’s not acceptable when the target is them.

Too many men are too accustomed to the idea of commenting on women’s bodies as if they have some personal right to do something so intimate.