I remember when I was parenting, the fact that my partner and I did not try to squeeze ourselves into gender roles helped the entire family.

We weren’t exactly interchangeable, though. I was much more interested in cooking, and better at it. I was also pretty creative about getting vegetables into a boy who wanted nothing to do with them.

But while that might be considered a sort of feminine gender role, I was also more likely to be the parent to set limits and encourage a sense of self-discipline.

My partner was really good at emotional nurturing, sometimes better than I was.

We each had our strengths, but in the end, when Brent needed support, he didn’t hesitate to come to either of us. I honestly think we parented better by not squeezing ourselves into preconceived roles.

I love reading about how you guys created family and household structure even after a breakup. One of the strengths of not being heteronormative is that we get to imagine better ways of making families.