I came out during the tail end of the height of popularity of “Friend of Dorothy" as a code word for gay.

My friends and I used it once in a while, but it was more current among the generation of men older than me. My partner, who was a bit more than 20 years older than I was, used it all the time. He was also, stereotypically but enthusiastically, a huge fan of Judy Garland. Her overt and enthusiastic acceptance of gay men during a time when we were completely socially stigmatized was more than just refreshing.

It’s hard to understate the love gay people felt for her for daring to be an open ally, which I think is one of the reasons that “friend of Dorothy" endured for so long.