James Finn
1 min readJun 24, 2019

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How this used to drive me crazy in school and later the military, which is sometimes like high school on steroids.

“You stole my guy/girl! How dare you! I hate you!”

Sigh.

No, they didn’t steal anyone, because people aren’t property. They’re independent beings with their own lives and interests.

If they decide to go with somebody else, that’s their prerogative.

Granted, if two people are in a committed relationship and sneaking around has gone on, that injects complexity. But so often, that isn’t the case. People change their minds about dating all the time. That’s part of why we date –to try relationships on, especially when we’re adolescents.

Behaving as if potential partners are property is a toxic lesson to take away.

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James Finn
James Finn

Written by James Finn

James Finn is an LGBTQ columnist, a former Air Force intelligence analyst, an alumnus of Act Up NY, and an agented but unpublished novelist.

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