Good points all! And you want to know something else? A lot of times that question isn’t even sincere.
I’m almost 60, and when I was a young person, we knew how many queer people existed. It’s just that the fact of it was a dirty little secret.
So long as queerness stayed secret then it was reasonably tolerated, even if viciously gossiped about.
No, I think a lot of times when people today ask why there are so many queer people, they really mean why do so many queer people dare be open about it.