Fascinating, and the new vocabulary word for me. I’ve never heard the term metamour, though in retrospect I have had some.

A couple were of the parallel variety, but in both my long-term committed relationships, partner and I mostly did kitchen-table polyamory.

With my first partner, Lenny, we each occasionally had sex outside the relationship with someone our partner didn’t know. Out rule was that we talked about it, though. No tomcatting around on the sly.

In fact, I started my friendship with Brad that way. We met and had sex before he met Lenny. But I told Lenny all about Brad when all we had done was kiss and make out. Lenny told me later I sounded like a teenager in love.

Eventually, the two of them met and became good friends as well, with the friendship occasionally dipping into sexual territory for them. We never had a threesome, so I’m not exactly sure how to describe that relationship.

Later, with my next long-term partner, our kitchen-table polyamory was more about threesomes or foursomes then during my years with Lenny.

I don’t even know how to begin describing it, but it’s interesting to see that vocabulary is being developed.