Deon, I used to feel exactly the same way about my family, about disappointing them.

And it was hard.

I’m not gonna lie and say that I came out and then everything was magically OK again in a short while.

It was hard.

But you know what?

If I hadn’t done it, I’d have never lived and loved the way I have. I’d have never met the love of my life.

I’d have never raised a great kid who needed a parent and needed me exactly for who I was.

It’s been a lot better being me than pretending to be somebody else and being miserable.

So my family had a rough time. I had a rough time because of them.

We all got over it, though. We really did. I’m close with some of my biological family now.

With others I’m not. I have people in my life who might as well be family even with no blood relationship.

And it’s all OK. We’re all OK.

It seems impossibly hard at first, I know. You can do it, though.

Once the hard part is done, where else do you have to go but up?

Good luck, man!


Written by

Writer. Runner. Marine. Airman. Former LGBTQ and HIV activist. Former ActUpNY and Queer Nation. Polyglot. Middle-aged, uppity faggot.

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