Couldn’t agree more! As a gay man, I don’t quite fit into that category of men who especially need to be helping, not given that homophobia is deeply rooted in misogyny.

But all of us who count ourselves as feminists have to constantly question the little things we do. The traditions we repeat. The assumptions we don’t examine.

When I was a young Air Force officer, my first boss was a woman. She wasn’t the first woman captain in the military by a long shot, but she may as well have been by the way certain people reacted to her.

She was smart, capable, and very strong. She had to be, just to succeed in ways less qualified men took for granted as their due.

I asked her once how she put up with it. She shrugged. Said she hoped her grandkids had it better. Then we got back to work crunching numbers and burning midnight oil.

Women like her make me understand that men have to do better.

Writer. Runner. Marine. Airman. Former LGBTQ and HIV activist. Former ActUpNY and Queer Nation. Polyglot. Middle-aged, uppity faggot.