Cats are such a great object lesson in relationships.

My own new cat Elsa is perfectly happy getting a little physical attention when she wants it, and she can be very affectionate on her own terms.

In other words, she gets to make the calls. Imagine that.

Try to manhandle her or give her affection without her consent and she becomes distant and wary. Honor her autonomy and wishes, and she’s quite likely to be friendly and close.

I always ask before I pet her, not with my voice of course, with my hand. This is her saying no, not right now:

Image for post
Image for post

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store