By chance, starting about a decade ago, I developed several very close friendships with people from Lebanon who emigrated to the U.S. Most of them are from Muslim families, several from Christian families, none of them especially religious. (I mean, they were hanging out with an openly gay man who brought his dates to wine-tasting parties, so a certain amount of secular tolerance was built into the group.) Also, most of them are quite financially well off. They're mostly professionals, from a pharmacist, a physician, a couple college professors, to a very successful real estate entrepreneur.
I learned a lot from them that I did not expect, maybe especially the depth of their distress and grief over the plight of Palestinians, with whom they intensely identify. Even my physician friend whose uncle was an important Christian bishop in the Maghreb is fiercely supportive of Palestinians, who for the most part don't even share his religion. He identifies intensely with their suffering, which is not theoretical for him. He grew up in Lebanon and Saudi Arabia, so he personally knows many suffering Palestinians besides being intimately familiar with the stories of other suffering Palestinians.
He cannot be neutral, which he clearly admits, and which he expects me to understand and appreciate, telling me that SOMEBODY in the world has to care about such overwhelming suffering. He means Palestinian suffering, not Israeli suffering. In especially honest moments, he admits to experiencing extremely negative feelings, even hateful feelings, about the state of Israel
He tries very hard to appreciate nuance, and to some extent he succeeds, but he simply can't help take sides. His own experiences as a dark-skinned American immigrant (despite being a relatively successful immigrant with a high income compared to most Americans), have actually reinforced his views that racist bias plays some role in the Palestinian conflict. He gets discriminated against in the US because of his brown skin, and he can't help relate that to Israelis who look white oppressing Palestinians who don't.
I could have written about several of my other Lebanese friends, almost all of whom express feelings quite similar to my physician friend.
I'm not saying he's right, and I understand that much nuance is required here, but he feels what he feels based on his own life, and working for balance and nuance is always going to be challenging for him. He admits that!
Which is all the more reason, as you say, for people with more distance to avoid falling into hardline positions that don't take the suffering of all people in the region into account.
That is more necessary now than ever.
